You Consume Me - Part 5

She couldn’t sleep even though she felt completely drained out after the party. She didn’t want to accept or see the obvious reason for the sleeplessness and so she pulled out the book she had been reading. Switching on the reading lamp, she tried to read. She read and reread the same line, trying her best to focus on the book but her mind just refused to concentrate. She couldn’t move to the next line as the visions of him swaying with another girl flashed across her mind, in her eyes.

His happy face when he opened the champagne bottle and raised a toast to celebrate his engagement made her cringe for reasons unknown to her. Why was she unhappy? Why was she even thinking so much about it, about him?

In fact she should be happy that he got a perfect girl for himself, someone like her who could handle a thick headed guy like him. She had wished this for him, even on his birthday. So what changed now?

She didn’t know and perhaps never wanted to know. She hugged her pillow and tried to sleep once more. In less than a minute, she was up again and this time, she fiddled with her phone. She felt that a chat with her fiancé would pull her out of this annoying state.

She opened WA but for some reason, her fingers clicked the contacts and scrolled to his name. Without a second thought, she clicked open the chat. She tried to reason out, “Afterall we are friends and can’t they have a conversation, especially after such a special day in his life?”

She agreed to her own reasoning and started typing. It started with “Hey” and she deleted it. She then typed congrats but then concluded that she already said that to him. She was so confused on how to start and what to say to him. Words just dissolved at her finger tips or probably in her conflicting mind.

Her heart longed to call him up and say all that she felt though she wasn’t clear what those feelings were. She was committed to someone and it wasn’t a casual affair. They were engaged and were getting married very soon. Then what was this new confusion?

She typed, erased, and then again typed. She didn’t know the passing time as her mind was clogged with lots of emotions. She was sad. And she was furious too with herself.

Her message never seemed to finish or get sent to him. He waited and waited. His patience surprised him. When his impatient side took over, he typed, “Type hi karthi rahogi, huh?”

He didn’t think much before sending it off.  Shocked would be an understatement. Caught offguard, red handed would be the exact state she was in. He knew that she was trying to talk to him. He had been observing her. She had to do something and cover up but what?

“Aur kitna waqt lagega??” his message beeped again and she quickly replied without further thinking, “I just wanted to congratulate you”

He was vexed at her audacity to lie and his annoyance was evident when he typed back, “Oh really?? Well then just do it?? Congratulations ki spelling bhool gayi kya?”

Now she was flaring up too. She muttered as she stared into his message, “Khadoos akdu kaheeka”

Then she typed it out, “Nah just thinking of a right way to do it….but I guess you are in a hurry for everything!”

Afterall his marriage decision was also in such a hurried manner. She couldn’t help a smirk when she thought about it. He was irritated by the act she put up. The façade was indeed getting too much for him. Before he could say anything more, another message popped up, “So now here it is…Congratulations! She is a nice girl and will keep you happy! Good night!”

And she quickly exited the chat and went offline but not before changing her DP to a new selfie of hers and her fiancé from the party.

“That’s it,” was his last sane thought. He also saw the picture change. Their fingers entwined and faces touching each other, so close they were. He fisted his hands and clenched his jaws before he threw the phone angrily on the bed. He had this urge to pick it back and call her but then he can’t or rather he won’t. She was doing all this on purpose.

Kaise batayein, kiun tujhko chahe, yaara bataa na paaye.

Baatein dilo ki, dekho jo baaki, aankhein tujhe samjhaye.

Tu jaane na ..aaa aaa aaa ........

Tu jaane na ....aaa aaaa........ tu jaane na ............

Milke bhi, hum na mile, tum se na jaane kiun.

Milon ke, hai faasle, tum se na jaane kiun.

anjaane, hai silsile, tum se na jaane kiun.

Sapne hai, palkon tale, tum se na jaane kiunnnnnnnnnnnn

Kaise bataayein, kiun tujhko chahe, yaara bataa na paaye.

His anger possessed him and his logical calm head was lost. He too quickly changed his DP to his picture with his girl. “Yes my girl, madly deeply in love with her”. That was his new status for the world to see. No, just for her to see. A tit-for-tat antic beyond which he didn’t want to think. He didn’t bother about anything else now.

The next few days flew in a buzz. The preparation for the engagement was happening in full swing. He never tried to meet her nor talk to her. He put up a mask of happiness and bliss, making sure that his new GF/would be fiancé was around him always. He made sure that his happiness and plan of settling down with her was very evident. His tweets, his FB and Whatsapp statues were all flooded with his love proclamations for his girl.

Every new step from him was causing havoc in her world. She wasn’t able to focus on her work. Every moment with her fiancé felt like she was stepping towards a big blunder. Her fiancé too didn’t make it easy for her. He was busy in his work and wasn’t giving her enough time. Their conversations too became short and to the point which sure wasn’t a good sign.

It was a new morning, right after his grand, pompous engagement ceremony. Harish called him up early in the morning to give him the news. It was the news of her bitter break up. In a second, his world seemed to change and he seemed to have forgotten everything else, their argument, their cold war, and his engagement.