It was the 5th time in a row that she averted her
eyes from his direction and he was so annoyed about it. Not that they shared
passionate eye locks often but then he couldn’t deny that those tiny moments of
gazing into each other’s eyes did have its soothingly positive effect on him.
And today, that peace was robbed off him. Was she purposefully avoiding him? Was
it langoor’s effect on her that kept her away from him? He chided himself for
that tacky thought because he knew that she loved that longtime lover of hers.
Lucky chap! What else could he say? If only they had met….
He forcefully ceased his thoughts to a standstill and shut
out his dangerously overpowering emotions. Even then, he couldn’t help but wish
that they had met earlier, just a before the day she fell in love with that guy.
Just a day free from her love would have been enough to make her fall for him. It
would have changed their entire world.
He cut his thoughts short and tried to focus on his phone.
His friends gang was chatting on full swing and were constantly enquiring about
why he was so silent in the group. It was unlikely of him to stay quiet. So he
tried to indulge in their funny conversation and chat something randomly, just
to take his mind off her.
But it wasn’t easy. It never was. His thoughts betrayed him
again and he was back to thinking about her.
She looked so beautiful, graceful in the green saree. Nothing
new! He smiled to himself shyly wondering if he ever found her less than
beautiful. He was the daring type and never hid his mind or munched back his thoughts
but why was it so difficult to let his real thoughts known to her. Why did it
seem next to impossible to tell her what she meant to him and what his true
feelings were? Yes, he knew the answer too. The reason also her, her happy
world. He couldn’t let that crash down or let anything happen to that bubble
she cherished. He would never want to be the reason for that. So every time he
took one step towards her, he backed off five steps away from her silently. All
their so called ego clashes and petty fights were his meagre attempts in doing
that.
But every time he saw her or felt her a breath away from him,
his heart skipped a beat embossing in him the truth that never could he stop
loving or adoring her. Never could he even stop thinking about her.
There was a buzz in their neighborhood that she and Subbu
were getting married very soon, probably by the end of the year. Even in his
disappointment, in sheer despair and agony of losing her even without trying
once, he did feel happy for her and wished that she gets her happily ever after
life, just like a fairy tale. He never believed in fairy tales but she did and
for her, he too tried to believe in one.
And for her sake, he had to do something drastic very soon.
He had to back away from her life once and for all because he knew that without
that lock, he could end up hurting and crumbling her blissful life. Whenever he
saw her in another man’s arms, he had this ruthless urge to pluck her away from
there. The naïve truth was that he didn’t trust himself in his decision to stay
out.
The next day was lohri and there was a party organized by his
friend. His entire friends circle would be there. He wondered if she would be
there too. One part of him wished her presence while the other…..Well, even a
tiny part of that wished her to be there.
With those thoughts in his mind, he drifted to his sleep.
He had no idea what the next day held for him. It was a
turning point, a totally sudden twist in the tale or perhaps something which
was going to change everything.
No comments:
Post a Comment