Is love blind? .......Oh yes it is!! - Episode 19

Anjali’s POV:

Sid’s closeness gave me a shiver….It almost knocked me out of my senses…..thank god it didn’t….else he would have known what I didn’t want him to know…..Allowing him to come closer would mean that I loved him too…….I didn’t want to give him a word of commitment which I wasn’t sure of living up to…..


Amidst this, a romantic song…OMG I was sooo irritated…..I nearly yelled at the radio.....poor radio!!!…..
It was one of my favorites but it came in such a awkward situation….


The truth was that I didn’t know what to reply to Sid….I was really tensed of giving him a reply…..Somewhere deep inside my mind, I had developed a liking for him but I wasn’t sure if that was love….I had never thought about an affair….Love affair and love marriage were forbidden in my household … Things didn’t work that way in our family…..Elders select the life partner…..I was grown up with that idea …..I was constantly reminded of this by my dad, my mom and anybody from our relations who visited us…..So I didn’t dare to step out of that boundary…..but at the same time, I wasn’t fully convinced of that idea too……

After all it’s my life and I had some right over it…..I was double minded from the time Sid proposed me…..Accepting his proposal definitely meant that I break the rules laid down by the elders of my family…..especially my mom and aunts would definitely freak out…..Being the first girl child of the family, I was the darling of dadi and nani…but yet a love affair was too big an offence to be excused….

Leave all others, I couldn’t make my dad sad…..I love him so much…..
une naraaz karke mujhe kuch nahi chahiye……[I was reminded of an incident which came as a disaster to my family....one of my cousin had eloped and did a register marriage with a guy outside our religion........That day, i saw a strange fear and tension in my dad's eyes......A fear that haunts every grown up girl's dad.....I had promised my dad that i would do nothing which would make him lower his head in shame........]


Anyways, I had time to think about all this….Why am I bothered so much???It is not a do or die situation that I need to worry like this…. Hmmmm…..I pushed aside all these thoughts and entered my house….I expected one round of scolding from my mom for coming in late….but no….to my surprise, I was greeted with a sweet smile from her……and a very warm welcome from papa too….
Mom: aao beta…kabse tumaari intezaar kar rahe hai hum…….maine tumaari phone bhi try kiya….tumne phone switch off kyun kar rakha hai??
Anjali: [mind voice: oh no, Sid had switched it off…..and I forgot to switch on][I took the phone out of my purse and switched it on] nahi maa…..shayad charge nahi hai….isiliye……[mom shot back before I could complete]
Mom: teek hai koyi baat nahi…..tumaare liye ek surprise hai…..isiliye phone kiya tha….
Anjali: [tired but excited on hearing abt a surprise..a surprise always pepped me up] kya surprise maa?
Mom: tumaare papa se pooch…..
Anjali: [looks at her dad who is smiling]Aap batao papa….
Dad: teri Maa ki favorite topic hai….isiliye woh hi batayegi…….main sone jaa raha hoom……Sharadha, yaad se sumithra ji ko phone kar lena….

Mom: [assuring tone] haan haan….kar loongi….aur shagun ke baare mein bhi pooch loongi…..aap chintha math kariye…..
Anjali: [after her dad leaves] kaisa shagun?? Kiska shagun???? mukje koyi kuch kahega bhi ya nahi….yahan kya ho raha hai?

Mom: [sitting in a chair and pulling out one for me too] yahaan aaraam se beto, phir bataungi….

Anjali: [getting impatient…sits in the chair] hmmmm…bolo…
Mom: [in a deep concerned tone] hum ne tumaari shaadi pakki kar li hai…..
Anjali: [getting the shock of her life...any daughter would, hearing the news of her wedding like that] WHAT???? [laughs out] Aap mujhse mazaag kar rahi hai na?? Aaj April 1st nahi hai mom…..
Mom: nahi beta…..sacch mucch…
Anjali: [rolling her eyes] shaadi!!! ….mujhe lagtha hai ke aap hosh mein nahi ho…..jaakar so jaahiye…….kal baat karthe hai……
[I stood up to leave to my room….My mom held me back]

Mom: Anjali, main hosh mein hi hoom….aur sach yahi hai ke tumaari shaadi pakki hogayi hai….par tum daro math…..tumaare pasand jaan kar hi humne pakki ki hai…..ladke ko tum bohat acchi tareh se jaanthi ho!!!
Anjali: [mind voice: did they find out about Sid???but how is it possible??? No no…..then who are they talking about] kaun??
Mom: Rohit…..[phone rings] ek minute, abi aathi hoom!!!

Anjali: [shocked][mind voice: ROHIT!!! Lekhin usne iske baare mein kunch nahi kaha….may be he is also shocked like me….may be our parents mistook our relationship….] Maa, we are just [Mom signaled me to wait till she completes the call]

I could hear mom talking to someone over the phone….From her talk, I could make out that it was Rohit’s mom on the other side…..I could predict the questions from my mom’s replies….Rohit’s mom was asking about the marriage proposal!!

Mom: hello….namaste sumithra ji…..main aapko hi phone karne wali thi….Anjali se baat kar rahi thi….socha uske baad aapko phone karungi….haan haan…shaadi ke baare mein hi baat kar rahi thi…..[Mom looked at me] haan ji ….usko kya problem ho sakthi hai!! Rohit koyi ajnabi nahi hai…..haan Maine sab thayaari kar li ha…..aap behfikar rahiye….Haan dehthi hoom……
[Low voice: Anjali, idhar aajavo…..Rohit ki mom tumse baat karna chahthi hai…..lo….baat karlo…..][Mom rolled her eyes at me meaning that I shouldn’t show any disinterest when I speak to her….]

Anjali: hello aunty…


Aunty: Aunty nahi beta, ab se mummy bulaya karo….


Anjali: [hesitantly] hmmmm…


Aunty: main janthi hoom ke tumme Rohit pasand hai…phir bhi tumse sun na chahthi hoom…. tumme Rohit pasand hai na??


Anjali: [my mom was standing near me and urging me to say yes continuously...after a small pause, I replied half heartedly] hmmmm….[i didnt have any option]


Aunty: yeh kya….sirf “hmmm”,”hmmm” lagaa rakhaa hai….shadi ke baat se hi 
sharmagayi…..[grins] teek hai….Rohit tumse baat karne keliye behchen hai….Woh tumme airport se call karlega…ab tumaare mummy ko dho beta….

[Their conversation continued for another half an hour…..It was all regarding shagun and engagement…..They were talking about my engagement and that too without a proper consent from me……I couldn’t stand this any further…so I went to my room…….how could they do this???I had no other go but agree….or I should say forced to agree….i couldn’t hurt my mom and dad…..but I cant marry just like that……I can’t tell this to anybody here…..Maybe I should talk to Rohit about it….He will understand me surely…..But wait….what will I tell him???Will I tell him that I don’t like him??? I can’t state my studies as a reason…..The wedding was planned only after my studies……They are just finalizing it….a word of commitment was all that they intend……But why??? Are they trying to lock me up by this engagement??? Did they fear that I will run away with someone??? Maybe they did….Was Sidharth enough reason to hurt my parents??I didn’t even know if I love him…..I met him just a few months back……Whereas Rohit, I had hundred reasons to accept this proposal……..I know him from the time we shifted to Mumbai……he is my first friend here….Even before Aashu…..he is good looking, well settled, a great guy, and most important, he was my parents choice…….We understood each other……Our families too shared the wavelength….both typical upper middle class families…….but Sid was different in every sense….He was rich….very rich…..and all rich guys were spoilt brats….He might just be infatuated towards me……just a physical attraction……For him, love must be game…but….[I stopped thinking further]
Oh god, Am I comparing 2 prospective grooms??? Why am I???? I think i will go mad]

[I was just rewinding and forwarding these thoughts when my phone beeped……It was a message from Rohit…]

[Mummy called me up…. Anjali, I am soooooooo happy…..
Will call you once I reach there……
Love you
–Rohit]

[He was so happy with this proposal!!!….I was confused again….I didn’t know what to do…..How can I hurt him?? I can’t….]

[I realized that I hadn’t changed my dress too…..I dismissed all these for a while got up and for a shower……I took a warm shower and changed to my night dress when my phone rang…..It must be Rohit…..I picked up the phone without even seeing the name flashing……]

Anjali: hi Rohit….
Voice: [suspiciously…] Sid here Anjali….Did I call at the wrong time?? Were you expecting some other call???
Anjali: ohh sorry…..I mean yes, Rohit was supposed to call…..
Sid: hmmmm…..just called up to tell you that I reached home…..
Anjali: [surprised a bit] oh ok……Sid…. [He hung up before I could proceed…..Sometimes, he was impossible…..He was angry with me…..may be because I addressed him as Rohit….I felt that he was jealous and possessive….But wait did I like that anger atleast for a moment??well i didn’t know the answer….]

[I was stressed up totally……started reading a book to relax myself……. It was 12…Yet sleep evaded me…..Rohit hadn’t called too….may be he forgot…..or thought I would have slept…..I decided to close my eyes and try to get some sleep….My mom had asked me to sleep soon…..Rohit’s parents were to visit us in the morning……The obvious reason was to see me…..So I was asked to stay at home…..Shit….I hated it….I wished i could just become a kid again....Atleast such problems doesnt crop us for a kid.....]

[I just closed my eyes when my phone rang again…..”What great timing!!”......i thought as i picked up the phone!!!!]

[To be continued]